Mosaic Monday #70: Follow your Yellow Brick Road

Coffee and Cinnamon Bun

At the house of Dear Neighbor Friend

It was a struggle to compose this post, and even as I type these words, I am not sure the post will ever see the light of day.  The melee began when I decided to write about the third anniversary of my retirement, March 3.  In typical Angie fashion, I reviewed past posts on this topic (Week One, Week Three, Week Five, Week Twelve, Week Nineteen, Week Forty-One, Week Fifty-Two, Week One Hundred and Five). Part search for inspiration, and partly sprung from a desire to avoid repetition.

Visions of a Pulitzer Prize, or a National Geographic Photography Award, danced in my head as I scanned those posts.  From the distance of 24 months, I especially admired the post Bountifully Blessed from Week 52.  Insightful and spot on, and complete with resolutions for the rest of retirement.  And herein lies the rub.  Looking in the mirror, I know that I did not follow through on my good intentions as written in that post.  I have not succeeded in letting go of perfection and structure, and, despite my desire to enjoy more time crafting, these activities continue to get deferred because I have jumped head-first into volunteering, working and many other activities, which I give priority.  

Hand-drawn Valentine's Day card for Spousal Unit - I would like to have
more time to draw!

At this point, you are probably ready to click off this post to something more fun. You're probably thinking "Angie needs to get out of her own head," and you would probably be right.  Heck, several times my fingers have hovered over the "DELETE" key; wouldn't it be easier to write a typical light-hearted summary of February, and pitch it as "a month in the life of the retired Angie"?

Valentine's card and candy from Spousal Unit

But once I get an idea in my head, it's hard to get it out without some cathartic moment, some resolution.  How can I let myself off the hook without some introspection? So if you want to find some relief with Adorable Baby Animal pictures, I will understand.  The rest of you can stick with me and find out if the post makes it past a draft!!!

OK.  (You're still here?  GREAT!)  I think my fundamental challenge is the number of hours in the day.  Does anyone know how to double them?   Nope?  Sigh.  OK.  So the only solution is to decide what has to give.  Activities with Spousal Unit?  Blogging?  Cleaning the house? Community involvement? Time with Dear Neighbor Friend? Showering?  Working on the mountain?

And with Spring, new priorities will be added onto the list.  Gardening.  Travel.  Drinking wine on the deck.  What's a woman to do?

Cactus at the coffee shop

Earlier this week, in the midst of my brain-swirl, I posed this question to Spousal Unit: "Is there anything you thought we would do in the first three years of retirement that we haven't done?"  My friends, don't ask a question if you're not ready to hear the answer!  He said "Well, I thought we would have more down-time, like more movie nights or times that we cook dinner together."  Ouch.  It was a Wizard of Oz moment - Dorothy always knew there was no place like home, but she just needed to be reminded!  

If I am honest with myself, I recognize that I have developed some retirement habits that mean most evenings are committed to my activities (other than crafting).  Mind you, Spousal Unit is not sitting around twiddling his thumbs - he reads voraciously, loves watching the Lakers (read: LeBron) play basketball, and he has his favorite TV programs, all while cuddling with Maggie the cat. I should also mention that at no point during this conversation did Spousal Unit make me feel guilty about any of this.  In fact, he said that he supports me in all my activities as long as it makes me happy. But, even before this conversation, it has occurred to me more than a few times that going into our two separate worlds at night is not altogether satisfactory.

Swan River, February 20, 2020

Chicken Fiesta Bowl

Craggy Range Bar & Grill

So, I will be making some changes.  I have made some commitments that will wrap up mid-June, and I will follow through on them because it's the right thing to do.  But then I plan to make some significant cut-backs on my community involvement.  After all, no one wants me to stop showering!

It begs the question - what will I START/CONTINUE doing?  Movie nights and cooking dates with the Spousal Unit, for sure.  Personally, I have enjoyed our "wandering aimlessly" tours around Montana, and I want to do more.  Outings with Dear Neighbor Friend are essential.  Wine on the deck? you betcha.

(In February, Spousal Unit and I took our visitor Tim to the iconic Bar Stool Races in Martin City, part of the 42nd annual Cabin Fever Days.  It is just this type of unique Americana that I love to discover and experience.  Check out these videos.)

(When Dear Neighbor Friend and I go cross-country skiing, we are always accompanied by Sophie.  This enchanting dog hides pieces of deer fur under the snow, and when we reach that part of the trail, she retrieves the fur and joyfully tosses it into the air.  Check out this snippet of video - her playfulness is a message to us all!)

I am also really impassioned about an initiative called the Violet Protest.  I first read about it on someone's blog, but I have had a devil of a time tracing back to who it was - whoever you are, thank you!  For anyone in the US, check out the website link above.  "The Violet Protest is a public effort to send 50 hand-made ​textile squares to each and every member of Congress ​in support of core American values. Whether we knit, crochet, quilt, or embroider all 26,750 of these squares — through this social action, and from every corner of America; we as makers of all political persuasions, believe we can employ our willing spirit and our talents to contribute to healing divisions that threaten our country.  This collection of textile squares will be first displayed at Phoenix Art Museum, Fall 2020."

Now that's a CRAFTY cause worthy of my time!

As provocative as this week has been, pondering the relative value of showering versus time with Spousal Unit, I am glad it happened.  Even in retirement, it is possible to get into ruts and routines so deep that we can't see out.  It didn't take Dorothy's tornado to shake me free, but I did have to peek behind the Wizard's curtain.  If you have been my lion, my scarecrow and my tin man, sticking with me throughout this post, I thank you.  I think I am ready to see what the next year of retirement brings, following my Yellow Brick Road!  

 

Mosaic Monday

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